Dating a separated guy
I realized this guy hadn’t yet resolved his issues and had no business pursuing dating.Granted, breaking up can be a messy and complicated state of affairs altogether, but when the grounds are still rocky, it’s not wise to drag someone else into that.Some people say they are separated, and are still fully involved with their former spouse, working out the details of a divorce, maybe, discussing child custody, planning to sell the house, maybe.One man said he was separated, but in reality, that meant separate bedrooms, same house. One man (35 years ago; I was young) made me hide when his ex came over to leave something for the kids’ next visit. One guy was mortified when I said in passing that I didn’t date married men, and he knew he hadn’t finalized the divorce and he had been misleading me. I didn’t, but he did finalize the divorce within two months. It is important to understand your criteria, and it is important to understand the other person’s reality.Some people are truly separated, en route to a divorce, and are available for a committed relationship.We talked about our careers and there was a lot of laughs.
But there’s nothing like a not-yet-ex finding someone new to make the person who wanted the divorce in the first place have second thoughts about splitting up. As a result, your fun, new relationship with Ben will get bumped and bruised in the process of Ben’s divorce.With that being said, if a man is separated, he’s still married.Sometimes in a marriage, couples find themselves with their backs against the wall.Sometimes they find themselves running into the same conflicts over and over again and are at a standstill on what to do.The purpose of a separation is to allow space for both parties to step back and evaluate the problems without the influence of one other.
To sum it all up, he always had a problem and his overall attitude was a vibe-killer for someone like me who was just looking to get to know him better and have a good time.